I’m so tired of using the past tense. Or speaking on a topic in the present when all
I know is based on the past. Sometimes
it seems like everything that is interesting and exciting in my life has
already happened. I know that is not the
case, but it certainly feels that way.
There are so many conversations to which I can contribute
based on things that I experienced years ago; things I can no longer
experience. When my friends talk about a
hike, or a bike trip, or a round of golf, I act interested because I am interested. For the moment I can pretend it doesn’t
bother me; it’s not that hard.
But I’m tired of the past tense. An old man might enjoy speaking of his life
as a distant memory never to be seen again, but I am not that old. I cannot look at things that are five years
passed as if they were fifty. He looks
at his past with pride and a sense of normalcy; I look at mine with pride and a
strange sense of disconnectedness.
Let’s talk about what’s new and what’s coming. Let’s look forward. Let’s embrace what we have what will be. Let’s give it a shot.
