More Contrasts

I remember growing up we were always asked what sorts of things we enjoyed doing.  Whether it was on the first day of school, upon joining a new group, or in a conversation with a new acquaintance, that question always came up.  It seemed like everyone but me always included one thing in their response; hanging out with friends.  I always wondered what that meant.  It seemed to me that any time I spent with friends was spent doing something, not just hanging out.  Riding bikes, climbing trees, building forts, playing catch or whiffleball or sledding in the winter.  Even when we were inside we were usually playing Nintendo or later Sega Genesis.  Playing basketball in the driveway might have been as close to hanging out as anything else; there always seemed to be a lot of standing around. 

I never really understood what kids meant when they listed “hanging out with friends” as one of their favorite activities.  I always had something to bring me together with my peers; something we all wanted to do, and something for which we needed each other, whether to round out the team or strictly for companionship.  There was always an activity to bring us together beyond hanging out.

As I got older the idea remained and although a few sedentary activities (like drinking or watching sports) were added to the list, many of my relationships still revolved around physical activities like hiking, skiing, golf, or basketball. 

These are aspects of my social life I will never replace.  I struggle to think of what to do with people, whether it is my friends or my girlfriend.  You learn a lot about someone on a long hike or playing a round of golf.  Things like that make for easy companionship.  Without those experiences that were always such a big part of my life, I feel empty, I feel unfulfilled, and I know that feeling is here to stay.