Kids

A lot of people seem interested in the why of things.  They look back at the past and try to figure out what they may have done wrong. 

I was a reckless kid.  I went all out in everything I did.  I dove for the grounder when I had no shot at it.  I played tackle football and full contact hockey with kids much bigger than me.  I had too much pride to back down from a fight.  I never thought about whether I would get hurt. 

But that's being a kid.  Kids aren't meant to think about the future.  That's the great thing about it.  Kids live in the moment.

I will never know if any of my behavior contributed to my problems.  It makes no difference to me. 

If you want to blame yourself for an injury I had, a fight I got in, or anything else you feel guilty about, I guess I understand the sentiment.  But if I don't know then you can't possibly know, and feeling a lifetime of guilt isn't going to change a thing. 

Kids are kids.  They get hurt.  They do stupid shit.  They have fun.